Families are Forever

"marriage between a man and a woman is ordained of God"

Friday, November 11, 2011

Reactions.

Crisis are both dangerous and an opportunity. We have all been in a crisis, and if not, it will be coming your way soon. But how do we react when we are put in a crisis? Every one reacts differently, and it will then change our total outcome of the situation.

The five most common stressors that families will go through, are:
- Incarceration
- Adding a new family member (birth, adoption, marriage)
- Losing a job
- Illness/Death
- Infidelity

My little brother fainted at a cross country meet, not to long ago. He hadn't really eaten all day, nor did he have a lot of water. His body literally shut down, but my parents handled the situation very well. My parents first wanted to know that he would be okay, so while the paramedics were there, my dad was handling all of the financial things, while my mom was worrying about Jake. We were told that if he had been 'out' for a few more minutes he could have died. This was very devastating to hear.

Jacob is much better now, but at the time we could have blamed him for not eating and drinking water, or we could have put the blame on my mom for not making him a lunch. We could have blamed the other teammates for not telling the coach that he had thrown up bile before the race. We could have put the blame anywhere, but we didn't. Him fainting was a combination of things, and it wouldn't have gotten our family anywhere. We know that he is fine and that it was a freak accident.

How people reacts does effect the whole outcome to the situation. We should not judge others, or scapegoat. It is also not healthy to be in denial for a long period of time. The best way to get through a crisis is to: take responsibility, affirm worth of the family, balance self concern with others concern, reframing, and by using available resources. When families talk about things together, know that others are mourning, and spend time together-they will cope about the crisis in a more positive way. Crisis can be both an opportunity and a danger.

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